Have I told you lately that I’m getting a Great Dane? Ha. I think I’ve told everyone. Or more than everyone. And if you’re not everyone or in the know yet, let’s meet – hiya. Hello-hi-how-are-ya?
Anyhoo. Since mid-February this year, I’ve been waiting for the birth and growing and readiness of my Great Dane to come home. Not having kids, other than dog Ralph and rabbit Alice, this is a big moment for me. I mean, I sorta wanted to ask for sonograms of the pups. I kinda wanted her to be born on my birthday. Is it funny I had a private wish list on my amazon.com site?
For as long as I can remember, I’ve wanted a Great Dane. I have owned four Chihuahuas since then. Now, don’t get me wrong. I have Ralph Thomas right now, and I love all 8 lbs of that dog with 80 lbs of heart. Alice is very much the same. She’s bitchy and loving in her own special combination of mess. I love her too. But when you have a college apartment, you start with a small dog. And then when your now ex-spouse has a walker, you keep with the small dogs.
But I have stared at Great Danes in the park, across fields, with their owners. Something about their eyes and face and stature make these things seem almost like art. They are something you want to touch, but then just appreciate all at the same time. There is just a peace to them, something I want to have, and so, with a lot of searching and researching, Penelope is on her way.
In mere days, I will be welcoming a puppy into my home. Okay, given some height and weight charts, she’ll be twice as tall, and twice as heavy as Ralph is. This factor alone gives me the butterflies a bit. Why did I wait so long? I was afraid. Afraid that others had swayed me on how long they actually live. Afraid that I’d never had a big dog before, how on earth would I do this. Afraid that I couldn’t do it alone (At full size, she will weigh in around what I weigh…or more.)
I am tired of being afraid.
I have done plenty of things in this life for the first time by diving in and just accepting things as they come. This has served me well. Sometimes, it doesn’t always work perfectly, but I know that it always seems to work out, some how. Penny will be fulfilling a life long dream of owning something that I used to merely “gaze at in the store window”. She will represent a new chapter of diving in with confidence and excitement to something new.
I refuse to look back and have to reconcile with myself that I didn’t do everything I wanted to in this life. I have always said, “live big.”….and so, I am. (really. Big.)