Sometimes He thinks I may not notice

My husband is a saint. At the most, one month from today, we’ll be parents.  I thought I’d take the time to thank him out loud, since in a month we may get a little busy with this baby…

Thank you for putting together every piece of crib and stroller and baby gear that came into the house. I still think Ralph thinks that his canine life is much improved by a stroller, and Penny still wants that stuffed owl we bought for herself, but we’ll all learn to share together, won’t we?

Thank you for making a nursery with me that makes me feel like we put together something so completely our personality that I couldn’t imagine our little kiddo starting off anywhere else more perfect. We have always said that we find “home” within each other,  and his room is the embodiment of that belief.

Thank you for every time you told me I wasn’t fat, I was pregnant. and for calling me – dare I say it here – “sexy”, because Lord knows when you can’t put on your shoes, the last thing you feel is desirable. Thanks for telling me my grey hair looked like highlights, and that I never needed make up.  Feeling like a science experiment takes a toll on my confidence, and you were always there to pick me up.

Thank you for washing every single solitary teensy piece of clothing that came into our house. I have no idea how our kid will ever wear all of it, but goodness knows, he’s prepared to!

Thank you for every date night that we went on. Those last adult-nights-out are precious and memorable. I know we’ll try to maintain that in this next stage, but continuing to date you through our marriage means a ton to me.

Thank you for coming to every.single.solitary.doctor’s appointment. Thank you for being amazingly involved in the care of our kid. Thank you in week 6 when I thought we were losing him, for saying repeatedly that everything was going to be okay – and it was. You never faltered even when I thought it was all over. Thank you for your faith – it’s unreal.

Thank you for every bit of support when we decided to switch doctors in the 32nd week. I know you couldn’t help as much as you wanted, but being there and telling me it didn’t matter what it cost and that we were doing the right thing helped me get through all that paperwork and chaos.

Thanks for killing that snake in the middle of the eighth month – and walking me out to the car in your bare feet to show me that the snake was “all gone”, you have no idea how much I cannot jump vertically and how much I would have needed to. You’re my hero for that.

Thank you for every egg and toast that you made me at 5AM when you could have slept in, so that I stay on track with my gestational diabetes diet. Then, right behind that, thank you for every lunch where you detailed out to me what lunch and snack and thing I was eating to make sure my blood sugar stayed where it needed to be – especially since towards the end, putting lipstick on seemed to be a massive task.

Thanks for the massages when I needed them – especially since you have aversions to toes. Thanks for telling me to sit when you could help me with something, thanks for helping me off the couch when I felt like a turtle stuck on it’s back.

Thank you for all of the advice on how to deal with people who only saw me as a pregnant thing. Thanks for asking how I was doing, thanks for still seeing me as a wife and a friend and a numbers person and a volunteer, thanks for making me feel human, instead of a human incubator.

Thanks for tying my shoes. Holy mother that got hard. And thanks for that compression sock application – I’ll never forget it.

Thank you for supporting my want to get back into shape as soon as possible by indulging me in every thought I had about gym equipment, memberships, corsets, programs, diets and the like. But thank you more for never making me feel like I “had” to for you to love me, but only because you knew that’s what I wanted for myself.

Thank you for putting up with every tear and emotional break that I had – we both know it’s far more than most husbands with pregnant wives put up with – and you did it with such grace. You have no idea how much it means to have a partner who doesn’t hold a grudge and who genuinely wants to become better so we are better as a whole. You continue to be my best friend, who I can share everything with – and that’s a rare person in this world.

Thanks for hiking things back and forth and up and down, out of attics, to and from storage facilities, and from every shop in between to help us get every tiny thing imaginable needed for our little unimaginable tiny thing! I know he and I appreciate all the sweat equity you have put in.

Heck, thanks for just listening to me babble about every aspect of whatever it is that I had to say that day. Sometimes just being heard was all I needed. I know you wanted an instructional manual on how to deal with a hormonal chick, I swear one day I’ll write one, but you did the best you could.

I know I missed a million small and big stuff in between the fog of these last 35 weeks, forgive me for not noticing all of them, there are too many things to count, but not one of them should have been missed – I know as soon as I hit publish on this piece, I’ll remember 12 more.

You are going to be an amazing Dad, thank you for being the man that I want our son to be. (and thanks for sharing your name.)

and most importantly, thank you for loving me and even considering this adventure with me. I have dreamed of this moment for more than 15 years, and it’s absolutely surreal to me that you and I are here, and it’s happening. I know we’ll love this baby more than we can ever imagine, but I couldn’t even do this, if I weren’t in love with you more than I could have ever dreamed of.